Words by Angel
Our story began in a very unlikely place; on a Christian University campus, while both in Christian majors. We were both still very closeted to most of our friends, and there was absolutely no thought in our brain that we would meet any other queer women, much less our future wife, on that campus!
Nicole transferred into my major the second semester of our freshman year, and as soon as we met, there was an instant connection, and I knew that this girl was going to be a staple part of my life. I was hoping for a long time that she was gay (you know how it is when you get those vibes!), but I didn’t have a lot of faith, knowing that it would be a slim chance that another queer woman would be in my major.
You can imagine my blissful surprise when she came out to me!
Our first “official” date was on August 21st, 2015. We spent every single night hanging out together after that date. We walked around campus together hours into the night talking about our struggles being gay and our faith in Christianity, and how we couldn’t believe we had found each other. I fell hard for her beautiful personality, her joyful smile, and her care for others.
As we got closer, The more in love we fell with each other, unfortunately, it came with more challenges.
We were buried deep into the church world. Nicole was raised in church all of her life, and I was on staff as a worship leader. Our friendship circle was almost exclusively church people, a lot of whom were very vocal about their disapproval for the LGBTQ+ community. Despite all of this, we couldn’t hide our love for each other any longer, and we finally came out publicly.
We lost a lot of friends and family – Nicole’s extremely religious Dad dropped out of her life, taking with him her half-siblings. I had to quit my job at my church, and I was left without a church family. People who we thought were our close friends no longer wanted anything to do with us.
However, something else happened that we never expected! We realised that we weren’t the only ones out there who were queer AND loved Jesus.
After we came out, we received a bunch of messages from friends and random people who were also queer and Christian. They asked for advice and told us stories of how they also were in spaces where it was dangerous to come out. From this whole experience, a longing and a desire to help others was born.
A few months after coming out, after planning, praying, and growing our own relationship, we launched our project – The One Frontier Organization. Through this project, we provide people with resources and community to help them know they are not alone. We make YouTube videos discussing our experiences and topics on LGBTQ-Christian themes. We also meet with people, share stories of other queer and religious people, and travel around the US to help spread love and acceptance.
I knew I wanted to marry Nicole during a trip to Yosemite with her family. It hit me like a ton of bricks – she was not only the person I was madly in love with, but also my best friend and partner in crime. Over the timespan of three years I had watched her grow into a beautiful woman who loves others so deeply, and who always puts everyone else first. She has changed so many people’s lives through our organisation, but the life she changed the most intensely, was my own.
Family means everything to her, so I hatched a plan to propose to her in her hometown, on the bay, in front of her whole family. It was super magical; the sunset was perfect! We had a bonfire afterwards, and my mother-in-law’s boyfriend actually surprised us with real fireworks he bought from Mexico, and we shot them off right there on the bay. It was crazy special.
A year later, and we’re finally married!
Unfortunately, there was a lot of rain during the few days leading up to the day of our wedding. That, combined with the fact that we chose a venue pretty far out in the middle of the forest, ended up scaring a lot of guests away. We lost almost half of our RSVPs in the timespan of just two days before the wedding. We were so stressed and disappointed at first, but it ended up being an intimate, special wedding, and we wouldn’t have asked for it any other way. We also got a TON of leftover food from the caterer because of it, so we weren’t complaining there either!
We went with a semi-traditional Christian ceremony, and we were so lucky to be able to have our pastor Brian and our friend Zac be there to officiate it. Something that was very important to us was taking our first communion together and praying with our pastor. Those were incredibly special moments for us.
For us, marriage is all about humbling yourself and loving your spouse through complete altruistic love. When we pour all of ourselves out to love the other person, then both of us will be loved in the way we need. Marriage also means vowing to point each other to Christ for the rest of our lives. We keep each other balanced, and God has taught us so much about love and life through loving each other. It’s so important for us to keep God at the centre of our marriage, because without Him, we know that we couldn’t love each other as well as we do.
Photography by Kendall Linderman | Catering Super Edible Events | Ceremony Venue The Gathering Place | Celebrant & Pastor Brian Frey, Zac Austin | Engagement Rings Pompeii3 | Wedding Rings Modern Gents | Wedding Attire Luv Bridal, David’s Bridal