Caty & Heather

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We shared Caty & Heather’s engagement story – here.

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Tell us a little about the inspiration behind your wedding day?

Our theme was a loose mix between an elegant garden party and a woodsy themed party. It was just nature-themed. Sage and Blush were our wedding colors, but there were tree cookie slabs everywhere, chalkboard paint accents, and lots of Sola Flowers, which are expertly carved wooden flowers that are more sustainable better for the environment.

We made all of the wedding favors, which were vials of tea with heart strainers, and we also made many of the Sola Flower bouquets placed around the reception venue.

Caty also learned how to do calligraphy for all of the wedding chalkboard and mirror signs.

Amazing so clever! What about the venue? What lead you to that?

We just wanted to get married in a place that was extremely accepting.

Both unapologetic about our love for each other, so we didn’t want to deal with the stress of having a venue that looked down on us for being a lesbian couple. We looked up the top ten most LGBT+ accepting wedding venues in Virginia, and the one we chose was number two on the list!! It looked perfect for us and, importantly, was in our home state, so we toured it and immediately put down a deposit. Everyone was so easy to work with, and being a vineyard, the wine was incredible. It was on a large hill overlooking all of the farmlands in Bridgewater, and it had an effortless, homely yet sophisticated classy vibe to it, and we loved the wide-open country feel!

Talk to us about your experience finding the perfect outfits.

We knew we both wanted to wear dresses, but didn’t want to spend a fortune on them.

C: Heather found this little boutique in downtown Fayetteville and in the back were these beautiful, simple lace dresses. She found this off the shoulder one that fit her like a glove, which was the one.

None of the white dresses really suited my style, so I decided to look towards the colored ones. A creamy, almost gold dress appealed to me so much, so we bought both of them on the spot. The dress I picked was all glitter and small designs, together with beautiful white flowers outlining the skirt, reminding me of the handpainted flowers on traditional Korean Hanboks, the traditional formal dress of Korean women. I am half Korean and was struggling to find a way to incorporate my culture into our wedding. The dress was a perfect way to show that.

Tell us all about the big day!

It was so perfect, from start to finish. We woke up together, had a relaxing bath in the soaker tub of our Airbnb, and had mimosas and brunch together with our bridesmaids. Then, we drove to the venue separately and got ready with our bridespeople. We didn’t want to see each other again until Caty was walking down the aisle to me. We had wine, got our hair and makeup done, and got to bond with our bridesmaids that morning until the ceremony. When Caty walked down the aisle, it was all worth it.

Our best advice for others planning their wedding is to make it exactly what you want! Everyone will give you their two cents, but f**k them (sorry!), this is YOUR day. We tried to incorporate everyone’s wants and desires at our wedding initially and realized that it turned into something we didn’t want. So we started from scratch. This party is probably one of the most expensive and emotionally draining of your entire life, so it better be worth it, and you have to look back on it with no regrets.

I’m glad we had a wedding, honestly. We thought about just eloping, but decided why not have the big old fancy wedding?! I’m so happy we did it. It was so symbolic, and I think it was a great start to the rest of our lives together.

Now you’re married, what does it mean to you both?

C: To me, marriage means dedicating your time to growing with someone for the rest of your life and dedicating time to the bettering of Heather and myself and our future children. It also means trusting, confiding, and being extremely vulnerable with that person, which is a privilege exclusive to them. Heather has seen me sick and weak; she has seen me hunched over a toilet bowl, throwing up everything inside me, and she has seen me with tears streaming down my face, utterly defeated with what life is throwing at me. But she has also seen me strong and sexy in lingerie, confident while I walk across the stage to get my college degree, and when I am crying happy tears from thinking of the beautiful life we live. In our marriage, I’m just excited to continue seeing Heather’s facets in all of our ventures in life.

H: Marriage is the ultimate commitment to your partner. It is far more than a legal binding. It is a lifelong commitment to love and support your spouse through all the uncertainties that life can bring. Marriage is a beautiful combination of love, friendship, and a desire to grow together as a unit.