Modern Elegance in Bali at a Private Jet Villa Engagement
Amanda (they/them) and Lavina’s (she/her) story starts in the most unplanned way, with a panda onesie at a queer bar in Adams Morgan and a moment that stuck. From that first rooftop meeting to a New Year’s Eve kiss and a northern lights proposal that unfolded in minus thirty two degree weather, their relationship has always had a mix of humour, intention and real tenderness. Their engagement session at the private jet villa in Bali, photographed by Koming Darmawan, felt like the perfect lead in to the three day Indian wedding they are now planning in Malta.
How did your story begin?
Many of you likely know this story already, since I love telling it (and yes, you can probably guess who’s writing this). It was a cold night in Adams Morgan, and one of us showed up to A League of Her Own in a panda onesie for absolutely no reason. Amanda was on the rooftop with a friend when Lavina walked out, and immediately whispered, “Wow, she’s stunning. I wish I could marry a girl like that one day but don’t think I ever could.”
Within an hour they’d hit it off and swapped numbers. Lavina didn’t live in DC yet, but 11.5 months later she did. They kept loosely in touch until New Year’s Eve 2019, when Lavina reached out asking where Amanda would be. The answer, of course, was the same bar.
Amanda, still convinced they had no shot, introduced Lavina to all their friends because she mentioned not having queer friends in DC (which was… not entirely true). Midnight crept closer.
As the crowd counted “TEN, NINE…,” Lavina turned and asked, “Do you want to be my New Year’s Kiss?” Amanda, shocked but certain, said yes.
And that was the start of everything… and technically the first time they said “I do.”
Why choose the northern lights for the proposal?
My fiancée had always wanted to see the northern lights. It was a huge bucket list dream, and she had mentioned it the year before as a vacation idea. It just felt like the perfect place. Snow, natural dancing lights, real MAGIC in the air. Honestly, there was no better choice.
Walk us through the proposal day. What actually happened?
Oh gosh, my heart was racing the whole day. I had planned our entire week in Finland around this moment. We started with a hot tub afternoon in minus twenty two degree weather, then a reindeer sleigh ride to look for the northern lights. But by evening it had dropped to minus thirty two. It was way too cold for a long ride and there were no lights in sight.
We were basically near frostbite and I was scrambling because that had been my planned proposal spot. So I switched things up. We warmed up in the reindeer hut, then headed back to our magical little cabin that had become our sanctuary. When she opened the door, I pulled out the ring box, gave this glorious speech about how much I love her and asked her to marry me. She remembers none of the speech because she was so shocked, but she said yes.
We popped the champagne I had chilled and looked out through the canopy windows. The sky looked beautiful, so I turned off the lights and suddenly the northern lights appeared. It felt meant to be. We went back out into that minus thirty two degree air, kissed under the lights and watched them dance for another two hours.
What was going through your mind during the proposal?
Amanda: Nervousness. Excitement. And absolutely frozen toes.
Lavina: I went straight into shock. I had imagined this day for four years and when it finally happened, it was so beautiful and so us. They listened to everything I wanted, which was for it to be just us with no photos and no video. The ring was perfect, their speech was perfect and their beautiful face was perfect.
Tell us about the ring. How did you choose it and what was the experience like?
HA! My fiancée trained me well. She had a very specific Pinterest board that showed me exactly what she liked. Our friend in Diamonds helped too, which made it all super easy. I shopped on my own, showed her best friend who approved, and a few weeks later the ring arrived.
When I saw it for the first time, I cried. Tears of joy and nerves. I remember thinking, “Would she choose me back?” She brings so much joy and vitality into my life. Does she feel the same? Only after my speech and her yes did all those nerves finally settle into pure ecstatic joy.
What has being engaged taught you about your relationship?
Amanda: Getting engaged honestly just felt like the natural next step in our story.
Lavina: Even though I knew Amanda was the one and I was so happy to say yes, I felt this unexpected dread and didn’t know why. Growing up South Asian and as an Indian woman, there was always this pressure that marriage was supposed to be the biggest thing I would ever do. Not my degree, not my masters, not my career. Just marriage.
Amanda has helped me shed so many of those expectations. Talking to my parents after getting engaged was incredibly healing too. I learned that a lot of that pressure came from generational trauma and we’ve healed a lot as a family. I am so grateful to see them just as excited for my engagement to someone who is not a man as they would have been if I were marrying a man.
How has wedding planning been so far?
Wedding planning has been great so far. We found an LGBT friendly planner in Malta for our three day Indian wedding, which has made everything feel easy and supported. We are both pretty laid back, so most of our decisions have come together without much stress.
What made you say yes to doing engagement photos?
Honestly, it was a surprise from my dad. He found the private jet villa on social media and Koming Darmawan happened to be their associated photographer. We ended up absolutely loving him. He made us, two very photo shy people, feel so much more comfortable.
How are you finding your wedding vendors and what matters most to you?
Luckily, our wedding planner has helped us find most of our key vendors. For our Pandit, I met an incredible queer Hindu priest who is willing to fly to Malta to marry us, which means so much to us.
Photography by Koming Darmawan
