One partner sits on the counter, laughing, while showing ultrasound images to the other.

Falling Pregnant After Multiple IUI and IVF cycles. 

Getting pregnant was hard. After multiple IUI’s they tried reciprocal IVF, but still no luck. It was their 10th and final attempt and they finally have a little human on the way.

How did you go into planning for a pregnancy?

No one could have been more naïve than Ari & I when we began our baby journey.

Encompassed with stories of DIY at-home successes, first attempt IUI positives, and other unconventional pregnancy tactics, we set off with our fingers crossed to our first fertility clinic in 2019. 

We thought it would be easy like all of the stories we heard previously. we thought we would be on our way with a positive pregnancy in no time. 

We were very wrong.

Tell us about your journey to doing reciprocal IVF.

With the first IUI procedure ending in a negative test, we learned that it was common to have to try IUI multiple times for the procedure to be successful. 

So we tried again. 

Another negative. 

We had one vial of our donor left, so we decided to go all in with reciprocal IVF. 

Ari went through the stimulation process, daily doses of injectable hormones, multiple appointments to Syracuse every week and one not-so-fun egg retrieval. We ended up with 8 frozen embryos. ecstatic we were, because IVF methods are proven much more effective than what we did previously. 

But, your journey to get pregnant was still far away. 

So we had our first embryo transfer. 


Another transfer. 

Another negative. 

We then transferred two the third time just hoping maybe one would implant. 


Throughout this time, we just kept thinking it would happen for us. my body would for sure figure it out one of these times. we were prepared. we even bought bigger cars *just in case*. 

After four failed transfers, we were mentally, emotionally and physically depleted. 

The medication made me lose hair, my butt was bruised and welted from shots. 

We decided we needed a break. 

Tell us about taking a break from IVF to regroup. 

We decided to focus on ourselves, our marriage and recomposing ourselves. 

With research, I changed everything I could. I stopped eating gluten, dairy, I started drinking water, working out, meditating, journaling, drinking tea, stopping coffee, acupuncture, IV’s, etc. 

I created the ideal womb. And, we went back in for our fifth transfer. 

And, it was another negative result. 

We were heartbroken.

The most important thing is that life never stopped during this time. We had appointments constantly. we still went to work, we still had to function. We had procedures done on Christmas, other holidays, during birthdays, funerals of loved ones, weddings that we were a part of, season after season. all around us, our friends were getting pregnant, throwing showers, having babies, having their second children, and we were left sitting empty handed. 

It was so painful.

Talk us through the decision to choose a new donor and start again.

After taking a bit of a hiatus, we decided to try again because we knew it was meant to happen for us. 

We switched our clinic, and chose a new donor. 

We tried IUI again twice, and both times were a failure. 

We were in much better hands, and had learned so much from our previous journey. 

For our 10th and final attempt at being parents, we decided to do another IVF procedure, this time- with my eggs. stimulation, medication, egg retrieval. 

And with our first embryo transfer, we finally… FINALLY saw that second line pop up.

Something that we hoped to see for years finally became reality. 

It’s been quite the ride and we have learned so much about ourselves, each other and – more importantly – how many others have been through an experience just like ours.

The universe chose when it was the right time for us and for that, I’ll be forever grateful.

Photography by Samm Aversa

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