Falling In Love With A Woman & Questioning Sexuality
Amy and I, Alice, have a love story that is my favorite (obviously).
Amy and I knew each other through mutual friends, but our paths never crossed, so we never actually met in person. When we finally did meet, due to Amy’s consistent DM’s to me on Instagram, I had zero intention of pursuing her romantically. Still, it became clear to me after a few hangs that her intentions were to be more than just friends. So nevertheless, I friend-zoned her. Hard.
Today, Amy says my actions and energy toward her during this time as friends did not match my words, which made her feel I was romantically interested. Luckily enough, we became friends and built a deeper relationship that ultimately brought us together as a couple.
I remember feeling an internal energy shift before we went on our first weekend trip together. And found myself missing Amy, wondering what she was doing when I’d see her next. I was internally struggling with my newfound feelings for her- feelings of interest, desire, and curiosity. For so long, I had limited myself to the societal and personal expectations I felt. Which didn’t allow for the free expression of my sexuality. I found myself mulling over questions such as “What would it mean if I dated a woman?”, “How will I be perceived in the world?”, “Do I now need to identify as a lesbian?” I was experiencing confusion around my sexuality, and although there were moments of discomfort and uncertainty, I knew that being my authentic self would bring only freedom and joy.
During our weekend trip together, I expressed all my thoughts and feelings to Amy. Allowing space for an open and honest conversation. I was quite surprised that Amy was still open to pursuing a relationship with me after nine months of friendship. Needless to say, that conversation changed our relationship for the better. We value each other, appreciate the little things, show respect, and deeply love one another for who they are.
Our relationship has not been perfect. At times it has challenged us, but it has shown us both the power of partnership. We wake up and choose each other, and we work at creating healthy ways of communicating.
Now, after a year and a few months, we are engaged!!! We were on vacation in Florida visiting Amy’s family when she secretly had a whole surprise engagement planned. To say I was shocked was an understatement, but nothing has ever felt more right than saying “yes.”
We look forward to planning our wedding and spending each day together, falling in love more and more every day.
Photography by Destiny Laureano